I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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