Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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