Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
His nipple licking is glorious
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