We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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