my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Randomize