she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
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