this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
