I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
jump out the window naked night went bad
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
