I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
