like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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