So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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