Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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