Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
