if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize