I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
he fucked my hip out of place.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
