the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Randomize
