pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
