i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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