YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
We are two peas in an std pod
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
