At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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