i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
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