Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
OPIZZABONMYDICK
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize