hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize