This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize