idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
