I'm really into asian looking animals
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
