Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
