your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
