I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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