yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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