I only kidnapped one of them. chill
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
