Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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