I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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