Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
my sisters under your porch take her home
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
