i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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