whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I fill condoms, not promises.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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