We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
