seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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