jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
