I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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