so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
