I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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