Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
