I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize