I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize