Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
