Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Randomize
