I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Sorry about my life...
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
