Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize