Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Randomize
