He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
