He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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