at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
It's official drugs can't kill me
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Randomize